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My Problem With College Finals AKA: Zombie Apocalypse 2013

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So I think it goes without saying that finals are not my cup of tea. I mean, have you ever actually heard someone say, “I’m real excited about finals week! It’s basically my favorite part of the entire semester!”? Umm, no. And if you have heard someone say this, feel free to punch them in the face. They’re probably a robot, and if anything you’ll just give their internal memory a little jolt. But seriously, it’s hands down the most stressful week of a college students life. There is so much pressure put on this one week, that people tend to get a little crazy. I saw a girl throw her spork (spoon/fork, if you’re still confused go to Taco Bell and ask for some silverware. Cheap bastards.) at the wall after staring at her computer screen for what I’m assuming was far too long. Her SPORK! That’s got to be some kind of misdemeanor, or if anything a not so subtle cry for help. And the biggest shocker, no one noticed or even seemed to care that this girl was having a meltdown in the middle of the student union. Does this mean that her irrational “spork throwing” behavior was socially acceptable, or even worse not noticed because everyone else in the union was going into deactivation mode too?

Yesterday I spent SIX HOURS straight studying for my Communications Law final just to go take the test and immediately forget everything I had spent those hours memorizing. Isn’t that what we’re all really doing anyways? Memorizing outlines, footnotes, study guides, and graphics our educational system thinks we need in order to prosper in the wonderful world of “Being An Adult”, just so we can get a grade that supposedly determines our value not only as a student, but as a person? The fact that all of my peers, whom might I add have different ways of learning, processing and retaining information, and come from all walks of life, are being tested the same way is absolutely insane.

On my first day of Kindergarten, I remember asking all of my classmates, “What’s your favorite color?”. This simple, yet very telling question helped me realize that every person is different. Not all of the girls in my class liked pink, and not all of the boys liked blue. Weird, right? In fact, I’m willing to bet that if I asked those same people that same question, their answer has more than likely changed. Why? Because different life experiences have helped mold us into who we are and what we like or dislike. Just like these same experiences have made us different in our ways of dealing with conflict, disappointment, excitement, fear, and what do you know, LEARNING. So, if every person has a different answer to a simple question of preferred color, then isn’t it fair enough to say that every person should not be tested  by the same 100 question exam at the end of a few months in order to determine their knowledge? Isn’t it fair to say that just because I forgot a math equation (which I will probably never use in “real life” anyway), or cannot remember how the misuse of registered trademarks effected the 1987 case of the San Francisco Arts & Athletics Inc. v. the United States Olympic Committee,  I am not a value to our society? Is a passing grade how we determine our worth?

I don’t know the answer to solve this problem, and I don’t think there is one solid solution. I do know, however, that finals week as of now is not ok. I’ve seen student after student walking around like zombies due to exhaustion. Is it, then, really a mystery why more and more college students are turning to prescription drugs like Adderall to help alleviate stress and get more accomplished within the limited time allotted? Doesn’t that make you think there’s something wrong with the bigger picture, and not just the student trying to study for five huge tests concurring within the same four days? It sure does get my wheels turning…

If I was expected to answer,”What’s your favorite color?” a specific way and my response was then used to determine my worth as a person and what I can bring to society, I would probably have to study for six hours before answering.

It’s green, by the way.

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